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Today is Chinese New Year, It is also Valentines Day

By Joe Espiritu
Today is Chinese New Year, It is also Valentines Day. Of course the Chinese will celebrate their New Year. That is the time they will celebrate Feng Shui individually or collectively. However, we are not sure if westernized Chinese would also celebrate Valentines Day at the same time. It is not likely that the do at all. They are a non demonstrative people and they would be rather caught dead than show affection in public. 

It is said that they do no even smile since smiling will cause wrinkles in the face. The inscrutable Oriental really does not display emotions and if they do, they do it with closed doors in rooms with double walling. Is they do not mix Valentines Day with their New Year it us within reason. Doing so would make them schizophrenic. Most cannot stand a clash of cultures. Anyway, they do not choose their mates themselves. It is their elders that do so. Blame the Chinese opera fro popularizing that concept.

We Filipinos swallow all foreign practices without trying to analyze their significance. We cannot invent our own. We practice Feng Shui even if we know that life or existence is a series of causes and effects, that an effect must be necessarily preceded by a correct cause. The rich get rich by working hard. Or stealing. Or practice nefarious activities like influence peddling. Or entering politics. The poor stay poor because they are lazy and practice Feng Shui hoping to hit a jackpot.

On the other hand, who is this St. Valentine anyway? What is his real story? Why is it that there is no icon of his on any church, Catholic, Protestant or whatever? The Spanish missionaries never, introduced Valentine to the Philippines. Protestant missionaries did not introduce him to Pacific islanders. Or to Africa. They may be afraid that lovers, legitimate or illicit would invoke his name to demand favors from their mates.

St Valentine is a patron saint of lovers and the most significant event in American history is the Chicago massacre of Johnny Torio (was it Johnny Torio?) and his gang by Al Capone, Capone did not want the Chicago to be shared by a rival gang so be lured his opponents to a secret meeting and gave a gift of machinegun bullets. The Ampatuans got the idea from Al Capone.

This massacre became the basis of the story why one must have a sweetheart at Valentines Day. That without one is to face a firing squad. We know someone who had survived firing squads since he was sixteen. It was rumored that "he cannot speak" or dili ka ingon". He was advised to try rape but he refused out of general principles though the subject is willing. Luckily the assigned firing squad was all cross eyed, poro libat and he survived until he is now forty. If he survives this year's firing squad, we will commission a platoon of Rangers to shoot him and bayonet him if he still escapes.

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